September / October 2001 Virginia Vobejda, Editor

Letter From The Director
Words Can Hurt
Spirit of Reconciliation Dedication Ceremony
Imagining Peaceful Schools
Kids Corner
Our Kids Count: The Denver Children's Initiative
Volunteer News
Volunteer Training Calendar
Volunteer Opportunities
Rave Reviews for The Conflict Center
Be Our Partner in Peacemaking

Letter From The Director Dear Friends, What an exciting time fall is at The Conflict Center. We are beginning school programs with the promise of creating peaceful environments; teachers and students are such fun to work with and so enthusiastic. Shay Bright, Vickie Samland and I attended and taught at a wonderful Restorative Justice Conference for three days this week. It was about acknowledging when harm has been done and about doing what is necessary to create right relationships. Lots of people from the criminal justice field were there, so it was exciting seeing these ideas from their perspective. We had an amazing letter from a couple of TCC members who enclosed their tax return check from the government. Let me quote, "the enclosed check is intended to signal a redirection of our tax money to one of the places it should have gone in the first place, one of our favorite causes - the management and mitigation, rather than the fomentation of conflict. We are confident that this money will be used carefully and thoughtfully in the cause of love, peace and respect for each other’s needs and deep convictions.” You can’t imagine how thrilled we, at The Conflict Center, were with this letter! Please note the flyer about James Garbarino and publicity about his new book. He’s been a hero in the field, studying kids and the effect of violence on them. He will be our speaker at the Ambassador of Peace Event in October. Hope we will see you there. Sincerely, Elizabeth Loescher Executive Director	Words Can Hurt Any language that minimizes another person is a form of verbal violence. Verbal violence can be and often is a stepping stone to physical violence. The Conflict Center offers materials and skill building programs focused on the affects of verbal violence. These materials are part of TCC’s “No Stingers” Campaign, which is designed to raise awareness about the emotional and financial costs of put downs, teasing and bullying. Programs focus on educating individuals in schools and workplaces, about the ways that negative language can affect them and those around them as well as teaching skills for effective and positive communication and problem solving. Addressing verbal violence is another way to create peaceful schools, businesses and communities. Check out our related book review "Words Will Never Hurt Me" by Sally Ogden. Spirit of Reconciliation Dedication Ceremony To express the philosophy and goals of The Conflict Center and in honor and in memory of a great and dedicated supporter, K. Norris, our bronze sculpture has been officially unveiled and dedicated. The sculpture was designed by artist, Wayne Salge, and produced by Fedde Bronze Works. We hope that its presence will not only enhance The Conflict Center and surrounding neighborhood, but will also become a beacon of love, healing and community building, encouraging all who strive for peace of the heart, mind and soul.
Imagining Peaceful Schools
The media is pushing back-to-school products like clothing, backpacks and school supplies. The message is that if everyone has brand new goods the year will go well. Not necessarily. While your children will tell you new everything will solve all their problems with their classmates, their ability to handle day-to-day conflicts is as important as their ability to handle classroom assignments. School can be a warm, friendly, secure place for our children. Or, it can be intimidating, dangerous and unfriendly. William Kreidler, author, teacher and conflict resolution expert, stresses five (5) principles for creating a peaceful classroom atmosphere. 1. Cooperation 2. Appreciation of diversity 3. Appropriate expression of feelings 4. Responsible decision making 5. Conflict resolution Children are not born with these skills. They can learn them if the skills are taught and demonstrated by adults who are modeling and suggesting alternatives if the first try is not successful. While not every attempt will be successful, it takes cooperation on both sides. While many adults no longer have school age children, they still have a responsibility to demonstrate caring and respect for others.	Learning conflict management takes more than one or two meetings. Practice and encouragement help children talk freely about the situations they encounter. All of us come with experiences and expectations based on our background and culture. The atmosphere in schools must allow students and adults to express their feelings without fearing criticism and ridicule. The success of conflict resolution can be judged by the answers to these questions: * Does the decision respect the rights and needs of the people affected? * Does it seem fair to everyone? * Do you have what you need to make the decision work?
Kids Corner School days are here. Are you ready? It’s great to get back to your friends whom you did not see during the summer. While it’s fun to get back in the swing of things, it is also time to understand that there will be conflicts among students. Many of you pack your lunch box full of good food for lunch. It’s also wise to pack your personal ‘tool box’ for use when conflict arises. Inside your personal tool box you’ll find these tools to use when you have a disagreement with a fellow student or your teachers: “I’m sorry” goes a long way to resolving a conflict. Share your toys and classroom items. Take turns helping each other accomplish tasks. Walk away from a potential conflict. Listen to your fellow students and teachers. Say how you feel and express yourself while being in control. Talk it out. Ask for help. The best answer is compromise where you both win. A win-win solution goes a long way towards resolving conflict.	Our Kids Count: The Denver Children's Initiative A ballot initiative that asks Denver residents to approve a sales tax increase of 2 cents on every $10 purchase will be put before the voters this fall, through a mail-in ballot. If approved, the initiative will generate approximately $23 million annually to support child care and before and after school programs for children and teens who lack high-quality stable supervision. Funds will be distributed by an independent, nonpartisan Commission on Children, to expand programs with a proven successful track record of providing innovative programs which benefit kids and strengthen parental roles and responsibilities. For more information contact the Colorado Children’s Campaign at 303-839-1580.
Volunteer News
CELEBRATE WITH US THE United Nations International Year of Volunteers Yes, 2001 is designated by the United Nations as a year recognizing the vital contribution of volunteers around the globe. The UN proclamation acknowledges the relevance of all volunteers in many cultures, including more than 4,000 volunteers placed in 145 countries through the UN Volunteer program (UNV). There is a need for such service, drawing upon the best initiatives and efforts - the "best practice" - of volunteers networked to the greatest effect. A local gathering will be held at Regis University on Thursday, September 20, from 4 to 6 pm, featuring the Volunteerism Time Capsule, sealed in 1990 to be opened in 2050. Ivan Scheier, nationally known trainer on volunteerism will speak. For information call Mary Lou McNatt, 303-964-3616 or visit www.iyv2001.org. Please consider joining the members of The Conflict Center Volunteer Program Committee who plan to attend. Stop by the office on the way and pick up your volunteer button or call Mary to bring it for you, 303-265-8622.	Special Program for Senior Volunteers Some of TCC’s senior volunteers (55 and older) are members of Volunteers of America's RSVP, Retired and Senior Volunteer Program. YOU too can share in a number of FREE benefits by joining RSVP, including: •Supplemental Volunteer personal and auto insurance •FREE Artreach tickets to cultural events •Recognition of your work in the volunteer community •Life Insurance •Travel reimbursements •The RSVP newsletter You will be asked, as we do in any case, to accurately report your hours to TCC so we can describe to VOA the vital contribution of our volunteers. We will gladly send you the necessary information and the application form so you can receive benefits and be counted as part of the RSVP program. Fortunately, I qualify and I am sending in my application. You can, too. For more information, contact me at 303-265-8622 or mezinnia@aol.com. Thanks, Mary Zinn Stewart
Volunteer Opportunities •Answering phones - Weekdays at TCC •Peace Day at Lansing Elementary - Friday, October 5th •Youth Peace Leadership Conference - Tuesday, October 23rd •Ambassador of Peace Award - Monday, October 29th For more information, call 303-433-4983 or e-mail conflictct@aol.com Volunteer Training Calendar • Volunteer Training: Monday, October 15th, 6:30 - 8:30 at TCC Volunteers Cary Leher and Mary Zinn-Stewart will present this free workshop designed for TCC volunteers to learn practical skills for conflict and anger management. • Volunteer Introduction: Tuesday, November 13th, 3-5 pm, at TCC	TCC VOLUNTEERS ARE THE BEST! Every volunteer hour is a treasured contribution, reducing violence and making peace in our community. As of August 31, 137 TCC volunteers have contributed 5,652 hours. We are certainly well on our way to reaching our goal of 10,000 hours by the end of the year. Special kudos to new volunteers Jim Mascolo, who created the graphics for the cover of TCC’s new curriculum and Karrmyn Strama, who contributed 42 hours in July, her first month with us! Remember to report your hours to Mary Ann Tarpey on a monthly basis.
Rave Reviews for the Conflict Center
“Clayton/Mile High Family Futures Early Head Start and Head Start were grateful to partner with The Conflict Center to address our families’ needs. Ninety percent of the families that we serve live at or below the federal poverty line. Recently, Tammy Sherwood and Esteban Rivero provided our program with a three-day parent training. There were separate Spanish and English speaking classes. Our families enjoyed interacting, hearing suggestions, and getting support from other parents who face similar challenges. The participants were empowered to take the concepts and ideas into the real world and translate them into usable actions and behaviors that affect their home life and work situations. Thank you for your continued vision of creating a more peaceful and nonviolent world.” “The Adams County One Stop” is very appreciative to be able to partner with The Conflict Center to address our clients’ needs and how they can benefit from the workshop series. We have referred clients from TANF, Employment First and Welfare to Work programs. Many of these clients are living well below the U.S. poverty guidelines and face many barriers to obtaining and sustaining employment. We appreciate having the Conflict Center as a resource and will continue to utilize these services to make a difference for the community we serve.” “On behalf of my students, I would like to thank you for making arrangements for the fabulous presentation which Israel Nunez gave to my class of Summer Scholars. He presented the material in a clear, friendly and professional manner. The students enjoyed the presentation and so did the mothers.” “The Conflict Center has been a wonderful agency for us to contact with regard to parenting and anger issues that our families at Lambuth* deal with on a daily basis. Those in attendance are able to leave the class excited to work with their children using newly learned, positive parenting skills. The parents learn from the classes, but the children reap the benefits! What a terrible loss it would be for our residents if The Conflict Center was unable to provide these classes.” * Lambuth Family Center at the Salvation Army Call The Conflict Center today at 303-433-4983 to schedule a workshop, class series or year-long program for your school, organization or business.
Be Our Partner in Peacemaking
Seeking Creative People! Are your creative talents looking for a new challenge? The Conflict Center wants to increase membership levels to support its programs and work in peacemaking. Become part of the leadership team of the Friends Membership Committee and put your creativity to work with a group of fun-loving people who will shape, develop and implement strategies to increase membership in The Conflict Center. For information, call Meg Ryan (303-320-7895) or Susan Drumm (303-715-1848). $ $ $ Tax Rebate Matching Grants Available $ $ $ Still trying to decide how to spend your tax rebate? We have a great idea for how to double your investment and make a difference in the community. Working Assets and GiveForChange will match contributions to nonprofit organizations. Here’s how it works. Just donate exactly $300 or $600 to any nonprofit in one transaction on www.GiveForChange.com between July 4, 2001 and November 1, 2001 and your donation will be matched. Only donations of exactly $300 or $600 will be eligible for the match. Matching gifts will be distributed upon completion of the match period after November 1, 2001