Frequently Asked Questions - Family

1) Isn't violence inevitable - just a fact of life- something a family has to live with?

2) What are some of the main causes of violence?

3) Is there a way to know if my family is at risk for being harmed by violence? for committing acts of violence?

4) What can we do to help protect our family from violence?

5) Our family lives in a unique neighborhood and has a unique cultural background. How can a "generic - one size fits all" class be meaningful for us?

6) Are the Classes offered by The Conflict Center effective in reducing the levels of violence in our family?

7) Will the Classes offered by The Conflict Center Classes eliminate violence in my family?

8) I know about "physical violence" - Are there other forms of violence?

9) What does the term "Youth At Risk" mean? How do I know if my child is "At Risk"?

FAQ1: Isn't violence inevitable - just a fact of life- something a family has to live with?

TCC: The Conflict Center believes that differences of opinion and human conflict are inevitable - even within a family unit - but violence is not. Acting violently is a choice. There are alternative ways of responding to conflict situations that occur within a family.

The Conflict Center classes help identify what these nonviolent alternatives are, and help family members develop the skills to apply these nonviolent approaches to manage their day-to-day conflicts.

Our goal at The Conflict Center is to help people reduce the levels of violence within their family.

FAQ2: What are some of the main causes of violence within a family?

TCC: A family is comprised of at least one parent/adult and one or more children/youth. Let's focus on the youth first. There are at least 6 ways violence can be present in a young person's life as illustrated in the Youth Violence Map below:

1) The Focus Youth may be inflicting violence on him/herself (substance abuse, eating disorder, negative thoughts, suicide attempts, debilitating phobias, inappropriate choices, etc.). The "cause" of this type of violence is the child him/herself, but finding the "root cause" of their behavior and implementing an appropriate invention may require professional counseling. If the "root cause" of the youth's violent behavior is a lack of information about nonviolent alternatives, The Conflict Center offers classes that can help young people make better life choices.

2) The Focus Youth may be experiencing repetitive violence from siblings or other youth in the form of bullying. The "cause" of this form of violence is the "bully." Bully Proofing/Prevention programs have been developed for schools applications that can be adapted to family bullying.

3) The Focus Youth may be experiencing sporadic violence caused by other youth. The Conflict Center offers classes that provide conflict management skills that include strategies for deescalating a conflict situation.

4) The Focus Youth may be experiencing violence caused by a parent within the family unit. The Conflict Center offers classes for teenagers that includes instruction for the parents.

5) The Focus Youth may be acting violently toward a parent. The Focus Youth is the cause of this category of violence. The Conflict Center offers classes for teenagers that includes instruction for the parents.

6) The Focus Youth may be acting violently toward other youth in the family. The Focus Youth is the cause of this category of violence. The Conflict Center offers classes that provide conflict management skills.

Each category of youth violence requires a specific Prevention or Intervention Program.

When the focus shifts to the parents, there are six similar categories of violence.

FAQ3: Is there a way to know if members of my family are at risk for being harmed by violence or for committing acts of violence?

TCC: The US Health and Human Services Department published a report several years ago that focused on Youth Violence: A Report of the Surgeon General, January, 2001. In the report, a number of "Risk Factors" are identified. Because human behavior is very complex, factors contributing to violent behavior are likewise complex.  Still, it was found that if specific conditions exist in a child's life during key phases of the development, there is a correlation between these conditions and later violent behavior as adolescents or adults.

Some of the "Risk Factors" or observable conditions that have been correlated with violent behavior are provided in the table below. These "Risk Factors" are not necessarily a "cause" of violence. For example, if a 10 year old boy is observed to be a "General Offender," one would have to look deeper to understand what "causes" his offensive behavior.

By applying the "Risk Factor" chart to your own family situation, you may be able to anticipate an occurrence of violent behavior and thereby take the appropriate preventive and intervention step early.

TCC: The Conflict Center is sensitive to the fact that each family has a unique background. Classes are tailored to fit the local community's needs and issues.