This is the happiest season of the year. Right? The lovely holidays do bring joy, family time, time off, wonderful mail. True? Probably, at least that’s what we hear. Much of it is true but unless we take time to think through all of the angles we may find ourselves victims of this special season. What could take away from this joyous time? Let me count the ways.

Trying to do too much. We feel we must do everything to the max. Last year was great but afterwards you thought of other ideas and heard of great things friends had done.

Overspending and the resulting oversize, overdue bills in January and February. Many of the overspending was not really that great.

Fatigue – We were all over-tired, you could say exhausted, by Christmas Day. Could that have been responsible for the flu-ish stuff we suffered after the big day?

Not enough family time. There were all of those brunches, lunches, dinner parties, lack of sleep. Is that what we want for this season?

Could any of the preceding have caused some of the unhappy, cross times with those we love the most?

But the holidays are upon us. What can be done? What about a family meeting? Discussion might include: What is causing this tension and anger?

What do we wish this season could be for us? What do we want most from it? Could some of the festivities be postponed for a quieter time, like January or February? Can we arrange to get enough rest? And, not the least, could we cut back on spending? Is some of the spending just a habit, a hangover from past years? Sometimes we are so into the way we’ve always done it, we pass up better ideas.

Here are some ideas, new and old.

• Draw names – (long used in groups)
• Limiting the cost of each gift.
• Put some of what each person would spend into a “money pot” to give to, or spend on a truly needy family or group.
• Discern what gatherings are still meaningful and cut back on worn out holdovers that may have lost their meaning.
• What about a special act of kindness for your loved one(s) or a charity? This could be more meaningful than spending.

If your family has already worked out these problems, congratulations. If you feel a bit of dread or anxiety as the days approach, use your ingenuity to work through the problem.